Easter funnies

[Warren Fisher]

Norman Barrett wrote:

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>
> Subject: Easter funnies.........
> ______________
>
> TAKEN FOR A RIDE
> ----------------
> John was driving home late one night when he picked up a hitchhiker.
> As they rode along he began to be suspicious of his passenger. John
> checked to see if his wallet was safe in the pocket of his coat that
> was on the seat between them, but it wasn't there! So he slammed on
> the brakes, ordered the hitchhiker out, and said, "Hand over the
> wallet immediately!"
>
> The frightened hitchhiker handed over a billfold, and John drove
> off. When he arrived home, he started to tell his wife about the
> experience, but she interrupted him, saying, "Before I forget,
> John, do you know that you left your wallet at home this morning?"
>
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>
> PONYING UP THE DOUGH
> --------------------
> Two horses were sitting at a bar. One horse said to the other, "I
> am such a wonderful horse. I made $100,000 for my owner racing last
> year."
>
> The second horse replied, "That's nothing! I made $1 million for
> my owner last year."
>
> At that moment, a dog came by and overheard the conversation to
> which he added, "You both are pathetic. I made $10 million racing
> for my owner last year."
>
> After the dog left, one horse said to the other, "Fancy that!
> A talking dog!"
>
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>
> VANITY INSANITY
> ---------------
> The girl knelt in the confessional and said, "Bless me, Father, for
> I have sinned."
>
> "What is it, child?"
>
> "Father, I have committed the sin of vanity. Several times  a day I gaze
> at
> myself in the mirror and tell myself how beautiful I am."
>
> The priest turned, took a good look at the girl, and said, "My dear,
> I have good news.  That isn't a sin - it's only a mistake."